Who wants to be a millionaire?

Tết, the Vietnamese lunar new year, and the country's most important holiday by far, was celebrated this year on January 26. Click here to see how I rang in 2009, year of the buffalo.

Being born a buffalo (or ox) myself I was very much looking forward to this particular year. I was, perhaps, even a little inordinately proud of my achievement of having been born in the year 1985--until, of course, a friend informed me that the buffalo, being a slow, hardworking animal, is generally seen as an augury of hard economic times--and my bubble was duly burst.

Like Christmas in the good ol' US of A, Tết is accompanied by its fair share of consumer-driven frenzy. Nevertheless, the pitch never rises to quite the level of, say, 5:30am at Best Buy the day after Thanksgiving. Fear not, Americans, you are still the unquestioned champions of world capitalism.

For example, rather than giving individual gifts, Vietnamese families often buy something for the whole family, such as a better (i.e., bigger) refrigerator (see exhibit 1) in the case of my host family.

For friends of the family, common gifts include cookies, giò (Vietnamese sausage) and the traditional bánh trưng (ingredients: pounded sticky rice, mung bean paste, pork fat, banana leaf wrapping; exhibits 2 and 3 show the cake wrapped and unwrapped, respectively). Right solid peasant fare that, designed to put extra flesh on the body with the highest degree of efficiency possible.



One exception to the general non-individual-gift-giving rule is the practice of giving lucky money to children and, occasionally, to elders. These gifts are usually handed over in the presence of the whole family with or without a pretty envelope to conceal the total amount given.

Upon learning of this, my delicate North American sensibilities were a bit jarred at first. What, you mean you just fork out cold cash? You mean no wish lists? No secrecy? No midnight wrapping whirlwinds or breathless trips to the third mall of the day to find that perfect gift that will let her know this year you really truly do understand her deepest wants-needs?

But then common sense made her blessed entrance and I came to the following four realizations:

1. Giving straight-up cash saves a lot of wasted presents, not to mention relational stress and forced thanks-for-the-socks-grandma smiles.
2. A related point: since gifts range from vnđ10,000 ($0.57) to vnđ200,000 ($11), in the end, less money is spent.
3. Even if you can count exactly how much lucky money you're worth to uncle Tien as he hands it to you, by the end of the day the envelopes and loose cash are so mixed up it's hard to remember who gave you how much.
4. With an exchange rate of 17,000 VN đồng = $1 U.S., I realized that by the end of the first day of Tết I had become a millionaire.
   

Perhaps my new found wealth has gotten to my head; nevertheless, despite the direful predictions of economic experts world over, I have a good feeling about this year. If Valentine's day and the February blues have got you down, why not consider hopping on a plane to sunny Vietnam, snagging a job as an English teacher, and becoming a millionaire in a matter of weeks? It would certainly change your perspective--by about 195 degrees Longitude to be exact.

Chúc Mừng Năm Mới - Happy New Year